How to Support Your Partner During Pregnancy
Pregnancy can bring with it a lot of unknowns - it can be easy to forget that oftentimes, we have all the tools we need within us to be there for our partners during this time. Keep reading to learn some ways you can be present and intentional as your partner and baby grow together.
Three pillars of support
When we think about supporting a loved one through their pregnancy, it can be helpful to break it down into three main categories as a foundation to build off of for your individual partner’s needs.
1. Psychosocial support - Be the sponge!
A pregnant person’s psychosocial experience can significantly impact their overall well-being and capacity to be present during their pregnancy and have a joyful experience. When we think about the psychosocial experience in pregnancy, we are talking about the deep connection between a person’s individual psyche and how that existence relates to the world around them. The kind of pregnancy a person has is not only shaped by their individual choices, thoughts, and feelings, but also of those around them in a very intimate and personal way that isn’t necessarily a factor when someone is not pregnant. This can be a lot to process - between one’s own internal insecurities to hearing from family members what type of milk they think your baby should drink, to the instagram ads telling you buy the latest gadget. Most of the times, people in pregnancy just need someone to be their “sponge”, a reliable and trusted person that can filter the noise of not only society, but also those pesky internal negative thoughts, and offer that constant reassurance and sense of safety.
Start planning for the big day and help with packing the hospital bag!
2. Physiological Support - Cooldown the hard drive!
The mind-body connection during pregnancy is one of the most powerful relationships in the body at that time, aside from the relationship between body and baby. A helpful tool can be to use a computer as a metaphor here to represent the growing pregnant body. It can be really helpful to keep in mind that this is a period of ‘re-coding’, where the body undergoes a complete rewiring in order to be able to grow a healthy baby and continue to support them outside of the body. Sometimes, the “computer” gets overheated as there will be times in pregnancy where there are multiple things plugged in at once due to where mom and baby are in the development process. In these instances, you may notice shorter tempers, increased fatigue, loss of motivation, forgetfulness, etc. One way to be a strong support system for your partner, is to assist them in re-calibrating their internal systems in order to reset and return to a more grounded sense of self. This can look like:
Setting up a soothing bath or shower with low lighting, essential oils, and calming music
Making your partner a calming cup of tea and inviting them to sit outside and enjoy some fresh air
Ensuring that your partner had adequate nutrition and hydration to meet baseline needs
3. Productive Support - Take the reins!
The cherry on top of the stress-pie for pregnant parents is the seemingly endless to-do list and nesting duties. One of the most impactful ways to be supportive to your pregnant loved one, is to ask them where their list is and just get to it! If your partner is continuously mentioning having to find a pediatrician, and also pick up the breast pump that her friend is letting her use, while trying to stock a freezer full of postpartum nutrient dense meals, all while growing a whole human in their uterus, it's understandable that they might be struggling with feeling overwhelmed and even a little depleted. Take a moment to reflect on what can be taken off your partner's plate in order to release some of the to-do list pressure.
Why supporting your partner matters
Making the decision to grow your family is a big life change. Being present and intentional during your partner’s pregnancy helps set your family up for success with a strong foundation for both emotional and logistical support of parenting. This is a time to lean into one another and explore new and creative ways to be there for one another. Try new tools to keep organized, explore new couples hobbies to stay connected and strengthen communication, and even reach out for help if you feel the foundation shaking. There are therapists and counselors who specialize in supporting this season of life and can be a great way to empower your connection and parenting journey.
Wondering where to find a doula near you? Look no further! One Love provides comprehensive support for expectant and new parents in Tampa, St. Petersburg, Land O’ Lakes, Lakeland, Plant City, Downtown Tampa, and beyond.
Our services include Tampa doula support, day of doula, childbirth education, placenta encapsulation, in-home postpartum doula care, specialized lactation support by our CLC’s and IBCLC’s, and sleep training!
Plus, we offer virtual services to accommodate your needs. Let's embark on your amazing birth and postpartum journey together!
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